The Krabby Kronicle

I miss doing press work.

That’s probably why I especially enjoyed watching The Krabby Kronicle today.

Yes, you guessed right, anything with the word “krabby” in it for sure has something to do with SpongeBob Squarepants. I’ve written before about my fondness for this cartoon character, and watching him pretend to be a journalist was the ultimate entertainment!

I tried to source the video of the show to share it here but Nickelodeon is very protective of their materials ... so I got a transcript of some of my favorite bits of the show:

Mr Krabs decides to launch his own newspaper when he realizes that the newspaper business “sure is easy money”, so he tells SpongeBob:

- Mr. Krabs: Off of your duff, boy. I expect you to wear two hats. 'Cause along with your usual fry cooking duties, you're my new lead reporter for the new Krabby Kronicle!”

But SpongeBob’s first story does not sell newspapers: he decided to write about Patrick Star watching a pole:

- Mr. Krabs: When you write these stories you've gotta use a little imagination, boy.

- SpongeBob: Imagination!

- Mr. Krabs: Yeah. Maybe instead of Man watches pole, you could say something like... oh... Man marries pole. Then you can alter the photo a little to fit the headline and, see? (Mr. Krabs modified it to look like what he said) Now that's a juicy story!

- SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, isn't that lying?

- Mr. Krabs: Don't think of it as lying, boy. Think of it as... uh... A practical joke. You know. Something everybody can have a good laugh about. The public expects a little embellishment here and there, so I want you to go out there, and get me a lead story that will sell!

See? This is why I miss doing press work. No offense, but characters as entertaining as the ones above are only found on TV cartoons and in certain media outlets!

TheCatalist

I usually get pretty excited when I am involved in a new project and the latest launch I have been involved in has not been any different; especially since it is about my own country and I had the opportunity to work with a good friend from home.

TheCatalist is a fantastic idea from someone who knows the power of creating possibilities, especially possibilities for a positive change. In this case, the aim is to empower the relation between Mexico and the USA through a change in the existing conversation. As simple as that.

I feel very proud to have been invited to be part of a project which has so much potential. My contribution consisted in doing what I love most: advising on the communications strategy and building up the blog that is the core of the project.

I invite you to take a look and contribute with your ideas and suggestions.

The blog is available in English at TheCatalist.org and in Spanish at ElCatalista.org.

How to annoy people in a lift

Annoying people in a lift? Why on earth would anybody bother to do that if by just saying ‘lift’ you already annoy the entire American population?!

Well, if you are a pre-teen girl this seems to be one of the ‘must-know-how-to-do’ things high on your priority list, right next to ‘how to make your own lip-gloss’ and ‘how to make a candle’. This is according to “The Girls’ Book” that my daughter is currently reading.

So, it got me thinking ... if I really wanted to annoy people in a lift (a.k.a. elevator) I would jump in, press all the buttons and jump out of the lift before the passengers realize that they will be stopping at every single floor on their way to their destination.

But no, this is a pre-teen cute girly book, remember? So instead of depicting acts of mid-age cruelty it actually includes some really funny ideas on how to be annoying to others in a lift, such as:

- Say ‘ding’ at each floor
- Suggest that you all join in a sing-along
- Salute and say ‘welcome aboard’ every time someone gets into the lift

and my favorite

- Open your bag and, while peeing inside, ask “Got enough air in there?!”

I might try one of these at work tomorrow.

Or maybe I should just act my age and try that lip-gloss recipe instead.

Places to avoid when you’ve been drinking

So, it’s finally Friday evening and you are enjoying Happy Hour at your favorite place with a couple of friends. Before you know, the time is almost midnight and you are still sitting at the bar enjoying the company. Not difficult after one too many drinks!

Time to decide where to go next.

You might not know where to go, but whatever you do regardless of the state of your mind (probably very liquid), make sure you avoid any of these three places:

1. Anywhere close to a police station
2. Your boss’ favorite hangout
3. The zoo
   

Yes, the zoo. Think about it. You might end up in jail for drunk-driving or lose your job for making a fool out of yourself, but nothing beats being savaged by a tiger!

Tigers, I am told, cannot stand the smell of alcohol and will devour anyone who has been drinking.

I have also heard that you can buy a tiger cub in the USA for a mere $1,000 and that this is why Texas has the largest population of tigers in the world.

So, if you live in Texas or are planning to visit Texas anytime soon you might want to consider sticking to Diet Coke!

Whatever you do ... cheers to the week-end!